A Girl Can Change Ur GOAL…Beware!
...
‘Jokes’ Category
How does a Stock Rise and Fall?
On a lighter vein, this is how business happens. Its not because of a country’s economy but word-of-mouth! 
click for a larger view.
Evolution of Bill Gates – Cartoon
Evolution of Bill Gates with Microsoft. There is more to go. Click for a larger view.
T20 World Cup Final: Shastri interviews Dhoni
In the post-match presentation, Ravi Shastri to Dhoni “Congratulations to you and the whole Indian team for winning this world cup. You guys have produced a great nail biting show.. and deserve the cup. We welcome you to share the joy with us.”
Dhoni “Thanks Ravi, the match was pretty close encounter between two great teams and our guys held the nerve to win the game and cup.”
Shastri, “Who was the main reason for this thrilling victory?”
Dhoni, “All us played well but I would say the main reason and man behind this great victory is Ajit Agarkar”
Shocked Shastri…, “Agarkar ? ? .. how come Agarkar… he didn’t play in the final”..
Dhoni, “Yepp.. that’s the reason we won this low scoring match.. if he could have bowled in final, Pakistan would have scored the winning runs from his 4 overs….”
Medical Certificate…
Doctor Certified
Certified that Mr. /Miss _________________ , working in your organization, is suffering from ‘time-bound’ illness. Due to this, he will NOT be able to work more than 8 hours a day and 5 days a week. Any attempt to stretch beyond this timing will lead to severe health problems. The losses to the company due to medical reimbursements will be far more compared to the gains made by stretching beyond 8 hours.
It is also warned to keep my patient away from any kind of shocking news such as ” Come over weekend..”, ” Let’s work on holiday..”, ” Leave cannot be granted. .” etc. which can directly lead to heart strokes.
In view of the above, it is strongly recommended to adjust your deadlines in accordance with the convenience of my patient.
Sd/-
Dr. Impatient
Cyber Clinic
Top 10 most stupid questions people usually ask in obvious situations
1. At the movies:
When you meet acquaintances/friends…
Stupid Question:- Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer:- Dont u know, I sell tickets in black over here..
2. In the bus:
A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet…
Stupid Question:- Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:- No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia…..why don’t you try again.
3. At a funeral:
One of the teary-eyed people ask…
Stupid Question:- Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:- Why? Would it rather have been you?
4. At a restaurant:
When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question:- Is the “Butter Paneer Masala” good??
Answer:- No, its terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occasionally also spit in it.
5. At a family get-together:
When some distant aunt meets you after years
Stupid Question:-Munna,Chickoo, you’ve become so big.
Answer:- Well you haven’t particularly shrunk yourself.
6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask…
Stupid Question:- Is the guy you’re marrying good?
Answer:- No,he’s a miserable wife-beating ,isensitive lout…it’s just the money.
7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call…
Stupid Question:- Sorry. were you sleeping?
Answer:- No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not. You thought I was sleeping…. you dumb witted moron.
8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair…
Stupid Question:- Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer:- No, its autumn and I’m shedding……
9. At the dentist when he’s sticking pointed objects in your mouth…
Stupid Question:- Tell me if it hurts?
Answer:- No it wont. It will just bleed.
10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman in your office asks…
Stupid Question:- Oh, so you smoke.
Answer:-
Gosh, it’s a miracle …………it was a piece of chalk and now it’s in flames!!!